Claudine's Update

Dear friends and family,

My wait is over. The test results are positive. At this point all I can say is – please keep me in your prayers. I am an internal processor, so at this time I need more time to think, to pray. I am sad. I am scared. I am overwhelmed. The feelings are something I can’t share at this moment. It is time for some serious prayer. A friend sent the below to me and I will share some of her words and a Psalm. It right now is the best words I can find.

I’m not sure what to say, “I’m sorry” doesn’t necessarily cut it, and in light of God’s sovereignty, it may not be appropriate either.

So, I just want to say, that we are here for you to lean on, pray with, cry together when needed, and to walk with you through this journey. But more than anything, we’re here to love you unconditionally. I cannot imagine the thoughts that are going through your mind, especially when thinking of your beautiful children.

I just want to encourage you to walk faithfully with our God, to beat at his chest, and to find comfort and peace as you seek to understand Him in these trials. If I may, I would like to share with you Psalm 139 and hope that for the time being, it will remind you of who He is and how much He loves you AND your children.

Psalm 139

1 O LORD, you have searched me
and you know me.

2 You know when I sit and when I rise;
you perceive my thoughts from afar.

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all my ways.

4 Before a word is on my tongue
you know it completely, O LORD.

5 You hem me in—behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me.

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too lofty for me to attain.

7 Where can I go from your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?

8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
if I make my bed in the depths, [a] you are there.

9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
if I settle on the far side of the sea,

10 even there your hand will guide me,
your right hand will hold me fast.

11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me
and the light become night around me,"

12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
the night will shine like the day,
for darkness is as light to you.

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

17 How precious to [b] me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!

18 Were I to count them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand.
When I awake,
I am still with you.

19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God!
Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!

20 They speak of you with evil intent;
your adversaries misuse your name.

21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD,
and abhor those who rise up against you?

22 I have nothing but hatred for them;
I count them my enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

24 See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.

Amen.

Love, Claudine